Saturday, July 17, 2010

Flying With A Large Cucumber

"Ma'am, we're going to have to do a manual inspection of your bag."


"Is there anything dangerous that could poke me in your bag?"

"Just a cucumber."

The TSA inspector narrowed his eyes at me, like he thought I was kidding.  What, like he hasn't seen someone fly with a cucumber before?

Yesterday, one of my co-workers brought in these cucumbers that she grew in her home garden in Denton, Texas. I've seen cucumbers bigger than these in length before, but certainly not ones with such... girth.  I guess it's true that everything is bigger in Texas.  I won't get into the details about all the vegetable porn references that were insinuated during our group excitement of measuring and photographing.  Totally workplace inappropriate.

12-inch ruler and pad of paper for size comparison 

Another co-worker took the bigger one and I got to keep the smaller one.  The smaller one is about 10.5 inches long, 9 inches around, and weighs in at just under 2 lbs.

Every Friday after work, I fly back home to Indiana, so this cucumber had to fly home with me.  Since I didn't check any luggage, I stuffed this cucumber in my travel purse.  And they flagged me for manual screening because "something" didn't look quite right on the airport security X-ray machine.  I suppose they couldn't tell that it was a large cucumber in the bottom of my purse.  Maybe it looked like something else. Like... a large zucchini?

Anyway, the TSA inspector carefully took everything out of my purse, one by one, and finally got to the cucumber.

"I told you I had a cucumber in there."

"Um... yep.  That's a cucumber alright."

"Is it okay if I fly with it?"

"You sure can.  You're all clear, ma'am.  Have a safe flight."

So I traveled home safely with my TSA-approved cucumber.

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Annie's Granny said...

You're lucky. I got my lemons confiscated flying out of LAX.

GrafixMuse said...

You have me giggling. I wish I could have seen the look on the inspector's face.

Engineeredgarden said...

That's pretty funny!

Dirt Lover said...

Wow, a cucumber with frequent flyer miles! What a story.

thyme2garden said...

Granny, I would have been so upset if they took my cucumber away at the airport. You never know what they will confiscate at the airport these days!

* * * * *
GrafixMuse, it was a good look! I would have taken a picture, but I didn't think I should push my luck with the TSA inspector.

* * * * *
Engineeredgarden, a funny story from the airport with a happy ending is always good. :)

* * * * *
Dirt Lover, I didn't even think about the frequent flyer miles aspect of it. But yes, this cucumber certainly logged some miles between Texas and Indiana, after being manhandled by at least 15 people along the way!

kitsapFG said...

Just watch... soon there will be new travel regulations restricting "cucumbers" to checked baggage only. The current security rules truly mystify me sometimes.

Anonymous said...

Those are very big cucumbers!
Somehow smaller cucumbers taste better, than big ones, at least for me. Did this one taste as good as it looks?

thyme2garden said...

kitsapFG, exactly my thoughts!

* * * * *
vrtlarica, I was actually worried that such a big cucumber wouldn't taste "right" but I was pleasantly surprised. The large cucumber was just as fresh, sweet, and crisp as any smaller cucumbers I've ever tasted.

debiclegg said...

I wish I could have seen the face of the inspector and I bet he had a story to tell, too!

thyme2garden said...

debiclegg, he sort of had an incredulous look on his face, but I bet he was thinking something along the lines of "thank god it's only a cucumber."

Faith Kolean said...

I've finally found a life form lower than a lawyer. A TSA Agent. At least a lawyer might feel bad from taking milk from a baby. If a TSA Agent took milk from a baby, they would probably drink it.

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